YOGA AND DEPRESSION

Lately, I have been meeting and receiving calls, messages from students and social media friends about the tough time they are going through their life which has affected them mentally and emotionally and caused depression. And they ask if yoga can help them to come out of these issues.
I felt like sharing something. Something personal. We all go through ‘that’ phase in life. When we are broken mentally and emotionally and it effects our relationship, health, social life and everything else...
I was a very strong person since small. Eldest child at home and leader at work. I sailed through life very calmly until some life events occurred. It pulled me down totally. I was shattered and broken into pieces, all negative. I was depressed and emotionally unstable and vulnerable. I consoled myself through junk food bingeing. Within a month I gained about 9 kgs. My health deteriorated and felt fatigue all the time and had no motivation to go on. My relationship with people around me turned sour. I was too ashamed to talk about it to anyone. I even thought of giving up on my precious dream job and running away from everything and everyone. I was on brink of life. And that is when yoga came into my life. I joined Hatha Yoga Class. My master said, “Asana alone will bring u ashore. Nothing else is needed.” I embedded it strongly in my mind. I was physically stiff and heavy back then. Even touching the toes was a big challenge. I practiced yoga asanas consistently, faithfully. I became a religious, devoted asana practitioner. I spent hours on mat, dropping of all the negativity. I rediscovered a more positive, strong and beautiful self on my mat every time. Gradually life changed. I became positive towards life. I accepted reality and started seeing everything in a bigger picture. I managed to let go everything that was weighing me down. My health improved and emotionally became very strong and stable. In 3 months I was back to my confident and independent self. Yoga saved my life. And that is when I decided to spread this sacred art to everyone, as much as possible till my last breath.
I always post pictures of me executing asanas so that I can inspire as many people as possible to walk into this path. When u see my pictures, u may see only physical strength and flexibility. But believe me,what yoga gives within is far more deeper, majestic. What is gained physically is only a small portion. I went through tremendous changes externally and internally. Now im sailing through a normal life happily, detached from all the mental and emotional turbulence giving out nothing but love and receiving in abundance. Lots more to come. I thank my one and only Guru Master SK Durai for being the person who transferred this technology to me and all the gurus and mahans for blessing my path.
There are many ways of coming out of depression. Look for help. Don’t let yourself drown. Yoga is one of it. Yoga will heal us in every way. Yoga will give what we need and more. If someone tells us that 1 medicine can give you everything, wouldn’t we take it at once? Yoga is the medicine.
(Pic: its not about the weight I have lost but everything else I have gained )

BUBU MY FRIEND

BUBU MY FRIEND

It was in 2006, when I was doing my internship in Penang GH, I received msg from an unknown number which read “Bubu sakit macam nak mati. Tapi mak jangan risau, Bubu strong” and I immediately replied “Sape ni?” There was no reply for a week. The message disturbed me. I sent a few “Sape ni?” messages but I did not call back. After a week there was a reply “Sorry, wrong number”.  Out of curiosity I immediately messaged “ Macam mana awak dapat number saya?” and without waiting for reply I asked “Awak sakit apa?”

Bubu explained that she was librarian in my university; she saved my number to ask about a book I borrowed. She was supposed to send the message to her mum but wrongly sent it to me. And that’s how our friendship started. Bubu was a 32 year old cancer patient, single mother of a 3 year old toddler. Her husband left the day he got to know that she’s suffering from cancer. She told me each and everything she was going through, about the disease, how excruciating her chemo sessions were, the agony she was going through to fight the battle. What amazed me about Bubu was, although she was hospitalized she was strong and was doing her Masters thesis paper. She told me she wants to finish off her masters and graduate before she leaves. Her will power amazed me totally.

The first thing I did after returning to KL after my internship was to visit Bubu in the hospital she was admitted. A wide smiled pretty woman. I didn’t have much money; I bought a rose and a chocolate bar. She gave me a motivational book in return. Her voice was soft but her stands were firm.  She had strong and creative ideas on a lot of things. She could talk all day on politics and her general knowledge was just mind blowing. She will read up the thesis paper she had done and happily tell how beautiful it was turning out. Masters kept her going. She will be telling me her dream to start up an NGO to help unfortunate kids and make them all read. I spent most of my evenings after class the next 5 months with her. Sometimes in hospital and sometimes at her home. But all that I know is that her health was deteriorating…she was slowly leaving.

One morning she messaged “Anu petang ni di hospital ok. Bubu sesak nafas.  Nak rest di hospital”. I knew that it will be her last message…and yes it was. After a week a received call from her number. I did not pick up. I knew that it was her family and not her. I stopped everything there. For me, strong Bubu is still around writing her thesis. Her disease wasn’t her choice but being brave and strong was. She did not lose her brave fight. I will see you one day Bubu.

There are so many warriors out there fighting their battle like a boss. Lets be thankful and grateful for all that we have got. Lets be more kind.  Lets pray for all these warriors.

Om

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SPIRITUAL JOURNEY

I have never been to anywhere out of Malaysia until July 2016. My first journey was straight to the ultimate. place where I thought I would last travel to before I leave this world. It was to Mahavatar Babaji's Cave in Dunagiri District, Kukuchina in Madhya Himalaya. It was full of thousands of magics and blessings. So many unforgettable experiences.  I snapped so many pictures and videos. I look at them often until today and feel so blessed for the journey.
Then in February 2017 I went backpacking to Coimbatore, Isha Foundation for Mahashivaratri celebration and to witness the inauguration of Adhiyogi's statue. I felt like it was important for me to be there. In the same trip I went to Palani Malai to visit Siddhar Bhogar as I'm a great fan of him as well as Pambatti Siddhar in Maruthamalai.
End of the year last year I went to Varanasi. A journey which changed me totally. I am not the same person anymore. The emotional Abyrami has vanished in the hugging of Maa Ganga. I returned home stronger than ever. And there I came across so many events which I was amazed to experience.
And today is the last day of my 5 days Thiruvanamalai Girivalam journey. But I included temples in Trichy too during this trip.
Something for sure, I become a better person for me, for the divine in and around me and I believe for those around me too. Throughout the journey I rediscover myself. It's because, during the travel I'm not a PTD, I'm not a teacher. I'm just Abyrami who parctices yoga. Before my first trip i was too anxious. I didnt know how to fix my mind and what to expect. My master asked me to travel without expectation. And i followed . I just travel everytime without any expectation and I come across magics.
Now on I will start writing about all my spiritual journey experiences. I have always had my travel log. I bring a book wherever I go and note down all my experiences. Now on I will transfer it on my blog for everyone to read :)
Om

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Anuradha Engira Abyrami

BAKASANA

And....I have decided to write again.Life has changed totally, tremendously since I last wrote. 

And I have decided to talk and to share my unique life journey once again to all those who are meant to read and meet me through my writing.
My very first writing will be about my favourite yoga pose.

Bakasana

           If I were to write or talk about Bakasana, I can do it for hours. Bakasana is always the closest Yoga asana to my heart. In fact it was the first yoga pose I ever executed even before joining yoga class. One fine day, few years ago, when I was feeling all lost and was standing in the middle of no where, I came across picture of a Yogini steadily up and smiling in this asana.  The positive vibe attracted me. I tried doing it immediately. Believe me, I spent hours for continuous 2 weeks figuring out how to carry my whole body with just with my palms.  And at at last after falling down many many times, I found the method and managed to carry myself up in bakasana (at that time I didn’t know that there are so many yoga demo videos in Youtube). 

             The moment I was up, all my problems seemed too small. It all fell down from me, waved me goodbye and flew far far away. I fell in love with yoga because of the confidence and self esteem which Bakasana gave me. 

              Bakasana opened a whole new beautiful life chapter for me, my yoga journey. It brought me my Guru, a new big loving family, everything else that I am and that I have now. This is the reason I have always made sure that  all my students are able to execute this asana in their very first class. I want them to believe that nothing is impossible. We are all unique and meant achieve wonders in our own way.

Pic: My Bakasana today-Above

       my very first bakasana-Bottom (look at my smile)

Anuradha Engira Abyrami

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